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How to Help Teens with Anxiety Build Leadership Skills Step by Step

Parents and caregivers who want to help teens with anxiety often face a difficult balancing act: nurturing leadership skills while protecting fragile mental health. The tension is real, as anxiety and depression can shrink a teen’s confidence and make even small responsibilities feel overwhelming. Pushing for “more” can backfire, yet stepping in too much can leave a young person feeling incapable. This approach ensures you can help teens with anxiety by connecting leadership to wellness, making progress feel safe, steady, and possible.

Understanding Leadership When Anxiety Is in the Mix

Leadership in teens is not a personality type. It is a set of skills like initiative, empathy, and emotional regulation that grow through practice. Anxiety, low motivation, and mood shifts can change how those skills show up, but they do not cancel them.

This matters because you can stop treating leadership as “more pressure” and start treating it as “right-sized reps.” When mental health dips, drive often dips too, and 20.17% of U.S. teenagers report a major depressive episode, so pacing and support are part of the plan.

Think of a teen who can’t lead a group project today, but can text a teammate kindly or ask one clear question. That is empathy and initiative in a smaller form, and intrinsic motivation can build from there. With this lens, you can model wellness and set anxiety-aware goals that fit your teen’s current capacity.

Build Anxiety-Aware Leadership Skills at Home

This process helps you grow leadership skills without overwhelming an anxious teen by turning “leadership” into small, doable practices at home, school, and with friends. It also protects your energy as a parent because you’ll be coaching with clear steps instead of constant crisis-managing.

Model steady wellness in plain sight
Start by naming and practicing one simple regulation tool you want your teen to copy, such as a short walk, a glass of water, or a two-minute reset before talking. Keep it visible and calm so leadership looks like self-management, not perfection.
Choose one independence task with a clear finish line
Pick a responsibility your teen can complete in 10 to 20 minutes, like emailing a teacher, packing for practice, or ordering their own meal. Make the target specific and observable, then step back while staying available for one question. Independence is a leadership foundation because it builds “I can handle this” evidence.
Set one anxiety-aware goal and scale it to capacity
Work together to choose a goal that stretches your teen slightly without flooding them, then define the smallest version that still counts. If social anxiety is high, the goal might be greeting one person or sending one friendly text, not leading the whole group. Agree on a backup plan for tough days, so the goal stays supportive instead of turning into pressure.
Teach cooperation through one small coordinating role
Invite your teen to practice leading with others in low-stakes ways, such as helping plan a hangout or managing a shared family task. A concrete option is to coordinate an activity with family or friends, with you acting as a quiet safety net if needed. Cooperation builds leadership because it strengthens communication, flexibility, and follow-through.
Practice accountability and decision-making with a weekly review
Once a week, ask three questions: What worked, what was hard, and what is the next right-sized step? Let your teen choose between two acceptable options so they get real decision practice without feeling trapped. Tie consequences to learning, not punishment, so setbacks become feedback.

Quick Answers for Stress-Smart Teen Leadership

Q: How can parents lead by example to help teens and young adults with anxiety and depression develop leadership skills centered on wellness?
A: Let your teen see you practice calm, repeatable self-care: a brief pause before reacting, a short walk, or asking for help early. Use simple language like “I’m noticing stress, so I’m resetting,” so leadership looks like regulation, not toughness. It also helps to normalize support since 30% of U.S. teenagers are already receiving mental health help.

Q: What strategies can encourage independence in teens and young adults who face anxiety and depression without increasing their stress?
A: Offer two manageable choices and let them pick, then keep the task small enough to finish the same day. Agree on a “pause plan” if anxiety spikes, such as taking five minutes and trying again once. Independence grows fastest when the experience ends in completion, not conflict.

Q: How can parents support goal-setting for their anxious or depressed teens while being mindful of their mental health challenges?
A: Co-create goals that include an easier backup version, so progress stays possible on hard days. Track effort and coping, not just outcomes, and celebrate follow-through on the smallest step. Treat the goal as information gathering, not a test of character.

Q: What are effective ways to teach cooperation and responsibility in teens and young adults managing anxiety and depression?
A: Give them a role that supports others without putting them on the spot, like organizing a shared calendar, setting up snacks, or confirming plans. Keep expectations concrete and time-limited, then debrief what felt stressful and what helped. Remember that over 80% of families identified informal caregivers as key supports, so looping in trusted adults can make teamwork feel safer.

Q: How can parents support their teens and young adults with anxiety and depression who are considering pursuing education or training in healthcare to advance their future opportunities?
A: Start by mapping your teen’s support network and mental health resources, including a clinician, school counselor, and one trusted adult mentor. Then explore flexible, low-pressure ways to test interest, like job shadowing, volunteering, or a short course, before committing to a full program. If direct patient care feels too intense right now, healthcare-adjacent paths like administration can still build leadership through planning, communication, and systems thinking, and those exploring healthcare management degree programs may find it useful to compare options.

Try These 10 Wellness-First Leadership Exercises This Week

When anxiety spikes, leadership practice needs to get smaller, not disappear. Pick a few of these wellness-first exercises to keep progress steady while protecting your teen’s energy, confidence, and support network.

Two-Minute “Body Check + Plan” Huddle: Before any leadership activity (club meeting, group project, volunteer shift), do a quick check-in: “What’s my stress number 1–10? What would make this 1 point easier?” Then choose one tiny support (sit near a friend, ask for the agenda, take a water break). This builds self-awareness and teaches leadership as pacing, not pushing.
Support-Network Map, Then Assign One “Helper Role”: Use the support map you started earlier and pick one person for one job this week: a teacher who can clarify expectations, a cousin who can practice a script, a coach who can offer a ride. The goal is sustained leadership progress through smart scaffolding, teens learn real leaders delegate and use resources.
“Low-Stakes Lead” With a 10-Minute Micro-Role: Choose a role that’s helpful but not spotlight-heavy: timekeeper, note-taker, greeter, or question-collector. Set a clear start and finish: “Do this for 10 minutes, then you’re done.” This builds reliability and resilience because your teen gets a completion win even on harder mental-health days.
Peer-Relationship Script Practice (3 Lines Only): Practice three short phrases that reduce social pressure: “Can you repeat that?”, “I need a minute, be right back,” and “I can do X, but not Y.” Run a 5-minute role-play at home, then your teen uses one line in real life. These scripts strengthen boundaries and collaboration, core wellness-centered leadership traits.
Open Story Swap: “One Hard Thing, One Strength”: At dinner or in the car, you share a brief story of a challenge and what helped you through it; then invite your teen to share if they want. This mirrors open storytelling sessions that can build empathy and team trust, key peer relationship skills. Keep it optional and short; listening counts as participating.
Create a “Plan B” for Flare Days (Without Quitting): Together, write two versions of the same commitment: Plan A (full) and Plan B (minimum). Example: Plan A is attending the whole meeting; Plan B is texting one idea to the group chat and reviewing notes afterward. This teaches consistency and reduces all-or-nothing thinking.
Weekly Wellness Leadership Mini-Meeting (15 Minutes): Choose one day to review: What helped? What drained you? What’s one adjustment for next week? Use a simple structure inspired by communication as a core part of supportive systems, clear expectations lower anxiety and increase follow-through.

One Small, Wellness-First Step Toward Teen Leadership Confidence

When anxiety shows up, leadership can feel risky, your teen may want to grow, yet their nervous system says “not today.” A wellness-first mindset keeps expectations gentle and consistent, empowering parents to support leadership practice while honoring mental health needs and overcoming anxiety barriers without giving up hope for families. Over time, these supportive parenting strategies reduce shame, build steadier confidence, and keep motivating leadership growth even during wobbly weeks. Leadership can grow at the same pace as emotional safety. Choose one exercise tonight and practice it once this week, then notice what helped your teen feel most steady. This is how families build resilience, connection, and lasting wellbeing, one doable step at a time.

For Parents: Check out the list 133 Things You Can Do for Self-Care here.

The Hidden Hustle: Non-Ecommerce Small Business Ideas for Stay-at-Home Parents

There’s something revolutionary about stay-at-home parents building a thriving business in the gaps between school pickups, lunch prep, and nap times. It’s not just about income—it’s about autonomy, creativity, and making space for personal ambition within the chaos of home life.

Too often, the conversation around home-based work loops back to online shops and e-commerce, as if the only way to work from your kitchen table is to become a product-pusher. But there’s a deeper, richer world of small business ideas—offline services, skill-based hustles, community-oriented work—that sidestep the warehouse-in-your-garage model entirely.

For parents who want to blend entrepreneurship with presence, there’s no shortage of meaningful, profitable paths.

Home-Based Freelance Consulting: Let Your Past Life Fuel Your Future

You might have spent a decade building skills in marketing, education, HR, or finance before switching gears to raise a family. What you know is valuable, and it can become a consulting business that you run entirely from your home.

Offering services like resume building, grant writing, curriculum planning, or even small business HR consulting gives you the freedom to take on clients as your schedule allows. You don’t need a storefront, inventory, or a massive startup budget—you just need to package what you already know in a way that serves someone else’s needs. And for clients who prefer Zoom over in-person meetings, your living room becomes your conference room.

In-Home Childcare: Turn the Chaos Into a Community Service

If your days are already centered around childcare, it might make sense to fold a few more kids into the mix—especially if your area has long waitlists for daycare or preschools. Starting an in-home childcare service can be both fulfilling and sustainable.

You’ll need to navigate your state’s licensing requirements and possibly make a few home modifications, but you’ll be providing something your community desperately needs. The added bonus? Your own kids get built-in socialization, and you earn income without ever leaving the house.

Local Tutoring or Educational Coaching: Share What You Know

If you’ve got a knack for breaking down complex subjects or if you were once a teacher or academic, tutoring might be your sweet spot. Parents are always on the lookout for support with reading comprehension, math confidence, or standardized test prep, and most prefer someone local they can trust. You can conduct sessions in your home, meet at a local library, or offer virtual options for flexibility. This kind of business thrives on word-of-mouth and trust—two things that parent communities are very good at generating.

Meal Planning and Personal Chef Services: Cook With Purpose

Some people see a messy garage and cringe—others see a goldmine. If you’ve got a talent for creating order, decluttering spaces, or helping people create more functional home workflows, you could build a business organizing other people’s chaos.

Think closet makeovers, paper decluttering, kitchen resets, or digital file organization. You’ll be solving problems for other overwhelmed parents, and you don’t need to sell a single product to do it. Just a clear eye, a good strategy, and the patience to help others get unstuck.

Pet Services from Home: Dog Sitting, Walking, and More

You love animals, and your home is pet-friendly—why not open your doors to furry clients? Dog boarding, pet daycare, or even in-home grooming for neighborhood clients can be a cozy and low-cost business.

Licensing and liability insurance are necessary steps, but beyond that, this is a business built on relationships and reputation. Many pet owners are looking for someone more personal than a kennel or large chain, and a parent who’s home all day is uniquely positioned to meet that need.

Protect Yourself

Before your first invoice goes out or your website goes live, you’ll want to decide on a business structure—and that decision matters more than it seems. If you’re running a solo operation out of your home, forming an LLC with ZenBusiness can be a smart move, offering limited liability that protects your personal assets in case something goes sideways.

You also get potential tax perks, less bureaucratic weight than a full-blown corporation, and the flexibility to scale without jumping through hoops. You don’t need to shell out thousands to a lawyer, either; you can file on your own or use a trusted formation service. Just make sure to review your state’s specific rules—some require annual reports or publication notices, and those details can sneak up on you if you’re not watching.

This isn’t about hustling 24/7 or turning motherhood into another job. It’s about finding work that fits into your life—not the other way around. These business ideas don’t rely on product drops, inventory management, or scaling an online empire.

They rely on your brain, your hands, your heart, and the community around you. If you build something that energizes you, reflects your skills, and aligns with your family life, you’re not just running a business. You’re building your own version of freedom.

Discover the journey of resilience and transformation at My Warrior Mom Life, where real stories of overcoming technology-induced family crises inspire and empower.

Exciting Ways to Keep Learning Enjoyable for Your Child

In an era where education often feels like a chore, finding inventive ways to spark a lifelong passion for learning in your child is crucial. As a parent, you hold the power to transform learning from a mundane task into an exciting adventure. Here are some effective strategies to keep learning enjoyable and a thrilling journey for your little ones, courtesy of My Warrior Mom Life.

Explore the World Together

One of the most dynamic methods to nurture a love for learning is by stepping out of the conventional classroom environment. Take your child to museums where history comes alive, science centers where they can touch and interact with exhibits, or nature trails that offer lessons in biology and conservation firsthand. Attending cultural events can also broaden their understanding of the world, allowing them to experience diversity in thought and lifestyle firsthand.

Set Goals as a Team

Collaboration in education strengthens the bond between you and your child and emphasizes the value of goals. Sit down together to discuss and set achievable learning objectives that are tailored to their interests and capabilities. This process not only motivates them but also teaches valuable skills in planning and responsibility. Whether it’s mastering a new math concept or completing a book, reaching these goals together can turn learning into a celebrated shared endeavor.

Model the Joy of Learning

When you dive into furthering your education, such as pursuing an online degree, you set a powerful example for your child. Engaging in studies like psychology allows you to delve into the intricacies of human behavior and cognitive processes, and this program can help you get started—check it out for more info. By balancing this pursuit with your other responsibilities, you showcase the lifelong value of education and personal growth, teaching your child that learning doesn’t have to stop at any age.

Engage with Hands-On Experiences

Swap passive screen time for active, hands-on learning to keep your child engaged. Activities that require interaction and manipulation, like science experiments, cooking, or art projects, make learning tangible and fun. These activities foster creativity and problem-solving skills, offering a more stimulating alternative to the passive reception of information through screens.

Foster a Love for Reading

Dedicate time each day for reading to develop a lifelong reading habit. Choose a variety of books that align with your child’s interests to keep them intrigued and invested, and pick one to read together. Reading not only improves language skills but also opens doors to different worlds and ideas. This daily habit can become a cherished part of your child’s routine, setting the foundation for continuous learning and curiosity.

Cultivate Critical Thinking

Encourage your child to think critically by asking questions that stimulate reflective thought and imagination. Instead of questions with straightforward answers, pose scenarios that require them to consider different outcomes or solutions. This method enhances their analytical skills and encourages a deeper understanding of the content, helping them to apply knowledge in various situations.

Learn in Groups

Group learning can be a fun and effective educational approach. Organize small study groups with your child’s friends or involve family members in learning activities. This social interaction enhances learning, as children often enjoy sharing knowledge and skills in a group setting. It can also lead to innovative ideas and solutions, showing them the value of collaboration and diverse thinking.

Celebrate Learning Achievements

Acknowledging your child’s successes, no matter how small, significantly boosts their self-esteem and affirms their efforts. Whether it’s a breakthrough in a science project or a step forward in reading skills, seize every chance to celebrate. This recognition not only cultivates a positive outlook on education but also drives their ambition to continue exploring and learning. Each celebration acts as a stepping stone, reinforcing their desire to achieve and learn more.

Transforming learning into a fun and engaging experience requires creativity, commitment, and enthusiasm from both you and your child. By integrating these strategies into your educational approach, you not only enhance your child’s cognitive and emotional development but also instill a robust appreciation for the lifelong journey of learning.

Finding a New Home: Navigating Change with Your Adopted Child

Relocating to a new home is a significant milestone for any family, particularly for those with an adopted child who may face unique challenges during this transition. Understanding and addressing these specific needs is crucial for ensuring a positive experience. This My Warrior Mom Life guide offers tailored advice to help adoptive families navigate the complexities of the home buying and selling process, fostering a smooth and nurturing move.

Building Trust Through Communication

Effective communication plays a crucial role in preparing adopted children for the transition of moving homes. Open, age-appropriate conversations about the reasons and expectations for the move are essential. It is important to recognize and affirm their feelings, addressing any concerns with empathy and reassurance. This not only lays a foundation of trust and security but also helps in fostering a sense of belonging and involvement in the family’s journey, ensuring the child feels heard and an integral part of the decision-making process. Additionally, this approach can significantly aid in easing any anxieties associated with the change, helping them to adapt more comfortably to their new environment.

Protect Your Investment with a Home Warranty

Investing in a home warranty for your new home is a smart move to safeguard against unexpected and costly repairs to your appliances or home systems. With a home warranty in place, you can have peace of mind knowing that essential repairs are covered, helping you avoid the financial strain of sudden breakdowns. To further enhance your protection, look for the electronics insurance option, which can cover the cost of repairing or replacing computers, televisions, certain smart home products, and more.

Leveraging Online Resources for Home Searching

Utilize online tools and resources to research potential homes and neighborhoods. Look for areas that are not only safe and child-friendly but also culturally diverse and inclusive. Online forums and community groups can provide valuable insights into the neighborhood’s culture and community spirit, aiding in making an informed choice.

Choosing an Energy-Efficient Home

Finding an energy-efficient home is a smart, sustainable choice that benefits both your wallet and the environment. These homes are designed with features like improved insulation, energy-saving appliances, and renewable energy sources to reduce energy consumption. Not only do they help lower monthly utility bills, but they also contribute to a healthier planet by reducing your carbon footprint.

The Advantage of Early Planning

Begin your moving preparations early, particularly for families with adopted children who might need extra time to adjust to the idea of relocating. A well-planned move reduces stress and provides a sense of control and predictability. This is especially beneficial for adopted children, who may have experienced instability in their early lives.

Moving Your Business

Relocating your business is a significant undertaking that requires careful planning and communication. It’s essential to keep your team informed throughout the process and establish a clear timeline, starting from the moment you decide to move. You can also reduce downtime by working remotely.

Preparing for the New Environment for the Adopted Child

Acclimatize your child to the new home and surroundings before the move. Visit local landmarks, future schools, and community centers together. This helps build a sense of familiarity and anticipation, easing the transition and making the new environment less daunting.

Cost-Effective and Personalized Moving Strategies

Involve your child in the moving process, perhaps by letting them choose decorations for their new space. Opt for the help of friends and family during the move rather than hiring professionals. This approach not only saves costs but also provides a familiar and supportive environment during the transition. Furthermore, using recycled or donated packing materials can be a cost-effective and environmentally friendly option.

Moving with adopted children requires thoughtful consideration and sensitivity to their unique experiences and needs. By following these comprehensive strategies, adoptive families can ensure a nurturing and supportive transition into their new home. This journey, when navigated thoughtfully, can strengthen family bonds and provide a foundation for a happy and secure future in your new home.

How to Plan for the Next School Break

Image via Pexels

How to Plan for the Next School Break

Children go to school 180 days a year, leaving you with little time to enjoy as a family during the school year. However, winter break usually lasts a little over a week, and spring break is only a few days, both of which are prime times for you and your family to spend quality time together. Today, My Warrior Mom Life has some tips to help make the next break more special.

Mini Vacation Destinations Ideas

While your children are home from school, plan a mini vacation. Visit a local inn or hotel with a pool. Consider having dinner delivered to your room as you and the entire family lounge in your pajamas, just relishing your time together.

Instead of an overnight trip, take day trips, and visit different local destinations during the break. For instance, visit a science center, play center, museum, library, or planetarium. Try to vary what you do, so all your children do something they enjoy. It also keeps your kids interested and entertained throughout the break.

Stay-at-Home Vacation Ideas

If you have to work during the kids’ school break and can’t get away, a road trip is probably out of the question. However, with a little planning, a winter or spring break at home can be just as entertaining.

First, stay as comfortable as possible. It’s easier to run after the children if you wear something comfortable, like this lounge dress; click here to plan ahead and purchase a few new comfy clothing items. Your children may appreciate a new pair of pajamas, too, so they can remain comfortable, as well.

While you’re at home, consider scheduling a day to play board games or do arts and crafts. Designate one evening as a movie night where the family snuggles in the living or family room. When you’re deciding on a movie, it’s best to take a vote. Another idea is to have a spa day and pretend you and your family are lounging at a luxury resort.

Preparing for the Vacation

Whether you’re planning to go away for the school break or stay home, start prepping for this time in advance. Finish all the laundry, run any errands, and clean the house before the school break. Don’t forget to go grocery shopping and select snacks everyone loves. Once you handle those tasks, you have nothing to focus on other than enjoying your time with the family.

Rules to Make the Most of This Time

Make it a time for little to no electronics. Savor every moment you can together without any distractions. Although your children may be a bit frustrated at first, once they’re having fun, they’re likely to forget all about their phones and tablets. Stick together most of the time to encourage interaction rather than having everyone disperse into their rooms. Also, avoid letting the kids stay up extremely late, so they wake up at a reasonable time and are in good spirits the next day.

Make the Next School Break a Time To Remember

With a game plan, you can make your children’s next school break a time for family and one they may remember forever. A little planning can make it more memorable (and less stressful) for you, as well.

My Warrior Mom Life is here to help parents like you navigate the modern world. Click here if you have any questions!

7 Simple Steps to Get Better Sleep and Wake Up Refreshed

It’s a common misconception that adults don’t need much sleep, but the truth is that sleep is essential for our overall health and well-being. It helps our bodies to recharge and repair, improves our memory and cognitive performance, and reduces stress levels. In this My Warrior Mom Life blog post, we will discuss seven simple steps you can take to help you sleep better and wake up feeling refreshed.

Optimize Your Sleep Environment

Your sleep environment plays a significant role in how well you sleep. It would be best if you had a cool, dark, and quiet room to help you fall asleep faster and stay asleep. Invest in light-blocking curtains, earplugs, or noise-canceling headphones if you live in a noisy area. Make sure your mattress and pillows are comfortable and supportive. Remove all electronics from your bedroom, including your phone, TV, or laptop.

Avoid Heavy Meals before Bedtime

Eating a heavy meal before bed can lead to an uncomfortable night of sleep. This is because it can cause indigestion, reflux, or heartburn, which can disrupt your rest. To avoid this, it’s best to eat your last meal at least two hours before bedtime and opt for a light snack if you feel hungry. Bananas, yogurt, or nuts are good options that won’t leave you feeling too full.

Focus on Walking More Every Day

Walking is an excellent low-impact exercise that can help you sleep better. It increases your endorphin levels, which boosts your mood and reduces stress and anxiety. Aim to walk for at least 30 minutes every day, preferably outside in a pedestrian-friendly neighborhood (areas with high walk scores usually have parks and activities nearby). You can also try walking meditation, where you focus on your breathing and your surroundings while walking slowly.

Try Aromatherapy

Aromatherapy is a natural way to promote relaxation and improve sleep quality. Essential oils like lavender, chamomile, and valerian root are popular choices for their calming properties. They can be used in various ways such as adding a few drops to bathwater, diffusing them in the bedroom, or using them in massage oil to help you unwind and get a good night’s sleep.

Listen to Calming Music

Listening to calming music before bedtime can help you relax and fall asleep faster. Choose slow, instrumental music with a low tempo and no lyrics. Some people prefer nature sounds such as ocean waves, rain, or bird songs. You can use a smart speaker, headphones, or a white noise machine to listen to your favorite music.

Limit Caffeine Intake

Caffeine is a powerful stimulant that can interfere with your sleep and keep you awake at night. It’s important to avoid consuming coffee, tea, or soda at least four hours before bedtime. If you’re in need of an energy boost during the day, try drinking green tea instead as it contains less caffeine than coffee but still provides a natural source of energy.

Durable and Breathable Cotton Bedding

Your bedding is a vital component in determining the quality of your sleep. Therefore, it is important to invest in new cotton bedding that is durable and breathable. Cotton, being a natural fiber, promotes air circulation, ensuring that you stay cool and comfortable throughout the night. Additionally, cotton is easy to maintain and lasts longer than synthetic materials, making it an excellent choice for your bedding.

Getting better sleep is not rocket science, but it does require some effort and discipline. By optimizing your sleep environment, walking more every day, investing in new cotton bedding that’s durable and breathable, and more, you can improve your sleep quality significantly. Remember, the key is to be consistent and patient. Give these tips a try and see how they work for you.

Beginning in Business: Advice for Aspiring ‘Mompreneurs’ (Guest Post)

by Cheryl Conklin
cherylc@wellnesscentral.info
Wellness is central to a happy life.

Being a “mompreneur” comes with some built-in challenges, often in the form of cute but demanding tinier versions of yourself. Getting into a good rhythm that allows you to be successful both in business and motherhood can take some time. You can save yourself some hours and energy, though, if you start from a place of solid information and practical advice.

1. Find the Right Business

Deciding what you want to pursue may come easy to you. You might have a hobby you’ve wanted to take to a professional level for a while. For others, the decision of what business to pursue might be more difficult.

Either way, you’ll need to find something that fits into your schedule. Assess how much time and what time you are able to devote to your business. For those with children not in school yet, flexibility may be the most important feature of a job. In those cases, freelance work or work that you can otherwise complete during the time you can grab throughout a day of parenting might be best.

Whatever your background, freelance opportunities abound: writing, bookkeeping, website development, and many more freelance jobs allow you to choose your own hours and work at your own pace. Moneymint.com lists a number of freelance marketplaces, such as Fiverr and Upwork, which are solid places to establish yourself as a freelancer and find freelance jobs.

Creatives who craft or create art can also work on their own time, and there are a variety of online marketplaces that allow you to see in exchange for seller’s fees. Many choose to start on these websites while building clientele on their own websites and social media shops so that they can eventually sell without having to pay seller fees.

2. Create Boundaries

In order to achieve a healthy work-life balance, boundaries must be set. When you’re in the home, it is difficult for your family to recognize you might have responsibilities other than those associated with being a mom, so it’s vital that you establish boundaries early on to demonstrate to your family your time, space, and attention is valuable elsewhere. If possible, set up a place in the home that can be off-limits to your family at all times. That way, your family will have a visual for your business that will help them recognize and respect your work.

Like physical boundaries, having your own time also will be necessary. Carve out specific times during the way when your family members know they should only access you when necessary. This can be tricky with very little ones, but your toddler’s or baby’s naptime can be a convenient time to sneak away. You can also utilize times when they may be especially calm each day: after lunch, for example, when they might enjoy a few minutes of play or television to themselves.

3. Get Educated

The business world is evolving every day, and online businesses are growing more rapidly than ever. Consider taking business classes in your free time to understand nuanced business practices and give yourself an edge over competitors. With hundreds of MBA programs available fully online, earning your degree at your own pace has never been more accessible.

Running a business while running a household is a challenge, but it’s one that mothers everywhere are embracing. With the right tools and knowledge, you can build a successful business from the comfort of your home and give your children a role model they can look up to up close: their mom.

Image via Pexels

Does Your Teen Stay Up All Night and Sleep All Day?

Mine does! I know I’m not alone as a parent concerned with this type of sleep pattern. My son recently turned 19 and is old enough to schedule his own sleep cycle. He is a “night owl”. He loves to play video games during the calm of the middle of the night. He watches Hulu, Netflix shows and Star Wars movies while most of us are sleeping. He Snapchats with friends and Facetimes with his long distance girlfriend (she lives in Canada, we are in California) at 1am, 2am and even later.

As teens head toward adulthood (at least in chronological terms), their lives become their own to manage. They are developing their own sense of self and what’s important to them. The connection with friends has always been easier for my son online, rather than in person in many instances. That was true before he went away for treatment and especially now, while at home during our pandemic.

My son will often stay up until 3am, 4am or 5am and sleep until noon, 1pm or 2pm. This pattern is fairly standard, even with his work schedule, which is right now just one day a week, at the local grocery store. He has complained for a long time that he just can’t get to sleep at night, even with some reinforcement by his taking the natural aid of melatonin.

We know he’s up at night because of the sounds of frequent trips into the kitchen: cupboards opening and closing, the refrigerator door opening the closing, as well as the washing machine for his weekly laundry. We joked with him recently as he started a load of laundry at 11pm, that it seemed awfully early to be doing laundry! He didn’t find it too funny. I guess laundry isn’t funny!

The phenomena of staying up all night and sleeping all day has been reported recently in the media. One commentary titled: Let Your Teens Stay Up All Night, And Other Pandemic Parenting Advice by Marlene Major from May 19, 2020, notes:

“Adults tend to do best with normal sleep and wake cycles. But our teens and college students might actually benefit from living in opposition to our values and expectations.”

Another article in the Boston Globe entitled: “Teens up all night and sleeping half the day. Endless Netflix binges. In lock down, kids carve out whole new schedules” by Hayley Kaufman points out that teens are also struggling during the pandemic and their schedules have turned them into “vampires”.

Ms. Kaufman quotes Dr. Stuart Ablon, the director of Think:Kids, a program in the department of psychiatry at Massachusetts General Hospital:

“Seeing points of friction through a different lens can provide a lift for parents. Take sleep schedules, for example. According to experts, staying up later and sleeping in fits better with teenagers’ biology. Optimally, teens need eight to 10 hours of sleep a night. Their circadian rhythms tend to make them night owls, something early school start times and bus schedules can wreak havoc with during a normal academic year.”

We are fortunate that my son’s school is out of session currently and if he does have classes for college in the fall, they will most likely be online, in the evening. We have also talked to our son about his current sleep patterns and it is clear to us that he is not concerned or worried about the hours he keeps. Having talked to other parents, I know my son is not the only one! As with other behaviors, it comes down to what a parent or family can accept vs what issues they want to take on.

On the positive side, a benefit when he is sleeping during the day, is that the house is very quiet and it is without any conflict. He doesn’t complain about typical noises coming from our kitchen, as we prepare breakfast and use the blender for smoothies. His best self comes out during our common time, in the early evening. We usually meet up in the kitchen and have quick conversations, as his mood or wake-up level may dictate. At 8pm, he is just gearing up for a long night ahead!

Another article from The New York Times published in 2019 called: “When Your 200-Month-Old Can’t Sleep Through the Night” by Perri Klass, M.D. states that their may be many factors can affect teens and their sleep:

“Social media and electronic devices in the bedroom. Intensely caffeinated drinks. The pressures of heavily overloaded schedules, including academic demands, extracurricular activities, travel sports teams, jobs and social lives.“

What teen is without these things in their lives? Very few. So it is possible that the valuable “good sleep” is something our teens are missing from their development and may prevent them from performing at their best. The article goes on to say that if something is important enough, then solutions can be found: turning screens at night and avoiding caffeine can help, along with practicing consistent bedtime patterns. We have tried mentioning those ideas and others, like using a phone garage that can “park” their phone and charge it at the same time, during sleep hours.

Except for when our son had no devices at all, during his time away at treatment, he continues to be connected to many screens. At 19, he is now at the helm of decisions on usage. The fact that he purchased his current iPhone himself, and took over his own phone plan at the end of last year, makes it much easier for me to deal with his usage issues. So, it is really is up to him from here on out!

What About the Science of Sleep?

Much has been written about circadian rhythms or the bodies’ biological clocks, the teenage brain and the science of sleep. Another quote from the article above:

“Amy R. Wolfson, a professor of psychology at Loyola University in Maryland, and the co-editor of The Oxford Handbook of Infant, Child, and Adolescent Sleep and Behavior, said that high school students tend to perform better in courses that meet later in the day, and perform better on cognitive tests when they are given in the afternoon.”

Many school professionals have discussed the topic of starting the school-day for teens slightly later, which matches what is known about teens’ biology. It makes sense that since teens stay up later, and they need their proper rest, that learning environments should reflect this information.

Is All Hope Lost?

No, I don’t think so. Part of growing up, especially for the older teen, is what they learn to do for themselves. That would include: healthy choices regarding sleep, eating habits and hygiene. We don’t have to agree on all their decisions, but hope to understand and give them room to succeed and fail. As parents, we know how important sleep is and it may be just a matter of time for those youngsters to figure it out, too! Until then, I will enjoy a quiet house in the middle of the day! Pleasant dreams!

Does your teen stay up at all hours? How are you handling it? Please comment below!

Additional resource about Sleep and Anxiety: All About Anxiety: Why Is It Preventing You From Sleeping? by Rose MacDowell from Sleepopolis

Self Care is a Primary Focus

Navigating today’s pandemic is a complicated mix of what to do and what not to do. It is certainly a stressful time, especially for those of us with teens who have struggled. It all comes down to the basic idea of self care. That term gets used all the time, yet it can be as individual as we are. Self-care is what we make it to be for ourselves.

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What is Self Care?

I refer to an article by By Raphailia Michael, MA (posted at PyschCentral.com) that defines self-care, called “What Self-Care Is – And What it is Not”. Three key components of self care include: mental, emotional and physical activities that help ground us and make us feel good. The author describes some basics that include proper sleep, nutrition, exercise, relaxing, spending quality time with loved ones, finding enjoyable activities and laughing each day.

In my “normal” list of self care physical activities: I have played tennis and pickle ball, swim, take walks, listen to music, watch light-hearted videos and movies and play the guitar. In today’s world, I can still take walks (so many walks, that my average steps are well over 14,000 per day), and many of my favorite activities, but not all of them.

Under our health orders in our county in CA, there are restrictions involving tennis and pickle ball, and swimming in our public pools. I will get back to those things all in good time and I’m okay with that. My health and those around me is too important to rush it and run into the possibility of more contamination and illness. So I feel good about following the guidelines, mainly because it’s the right thing to do.

My self care has evolved as we navigate our new world. There are so many simple and little pleasures I appreciate and enjoy.

Looking at and scanning old photographs
Baking my first sour dough bread loaf
Planning meals a week out since my shopping is now once a week
Planting a few veggies in pots: basil, tomato and padron peppers
More Warrior Mom Blog posts perhaps turning into a book…
Learning new songs on the guitar

Some Ideas to Deal with It All

It is tough to watch the whole world going through this pandemic. It is very sad to hear about the amount of death there has been. I do keep up with news and information, but at some point, we all get saturated and it brings us down. Here are some things I am doing to deal with it all:

I try to limit my news watching.
I try to find the positive stories of good people helping each other.
I try to stick to a routine.
I accept that change is always inevitable.
I try to connect with friends and family via phone or social media.
I try to be understanding to those around me.
I try to be mindful to relieve any stress, with breathing and being present.
I try to focus on what’s positive around me: the earth is resetting, families are together, solutions are in the works.
I like watching funny, creative videos.
I am fortunate to be able to keep selling on eBay. The ultimate work from home job!
I accept that things are different now vs before the outbreak.
I enjoy walking near my house and looking at all the beautiful flowers.
I am grateful my son is well and working.

The Unknown is Still Unknown

Having been through tough and uncertain times with a struggling teen during the past three years, I draw on the many tools I learned during that time. Just like “we lived our lives” during the past three years, we still don’t know what will happen tomorrow. No one does.

We all only have today.
One day at a time.
We are not alone.

We will get through this AND we need to work at it AND it will take time. (Time is such an odd concept, since we have a lot of that on our hands today.)

Our world has been forced to slow down. There are many people out of work and in need of financial aid. Our health becomes a priority. Staying healthy must include self-care. What does that look like for you?

Things I Want to Add to My Self Care List

I want to help others – not sure exactly what that means, but I’m thinking about it.
I want to get back to more reading: autobiographies are my top choice. Sally Field’s book is on my list.
I want to watch some great, old movies, since Tiger King does not interest me. Perhaps watch AFI’s Top 200 List!
I want to make bagels. The sour dough experiment was okay, but I think bagels would be fun!
I want to keep sorting and organizing photos and videos. I have so many!
I want to write more.
Get my bike out and start riding again!
Try some new recipes!

Last but not least, I count my blessings every day. It does sometimes feel like we are living in a real life version of “Groundhog Day” (Bill Murray movie), but each day is a gift. I have a loving family and as we continue to hunker down (I do love that expression), we are fortunate to have each other. I am confident that things in our world will evolve into a “new normal” and I am planning to continue with my self care.

Hanging in there,

WARRIOR MOM

Welcome to Adulting….My 18 1/2 Year Old Son

My now 18 1/2 year old son has been back home for four months. He was away for twenty-seven long months at three different treatment programs (Wilderness therapy, Residential Treatment Center aka “RTC” and a Step Down Program aka “Boarding School”). We are very happy to have him home, and he is doing well. He has recently taken some big steps forward that I’d like to share.

Welcome to Adulting!

The subtitle of this post might be called: “Time to Get a Job”. My son’s subtitle might be called: “My Gap Year After High School”.

Even before the term “Social Distancing” became a common expression, my son spent much of the last two months working his own version of social distancing, by keeping to himself, in his own room. Yes, I understand that is common for teenagers and young adults, around his age to want their own space. I know I did at his age, but he took it to another level. He became a Social Distance Master! He was ahead of the curve, especially since no one knew it would become an important skill!

Our home contract agreement stated that he either needed to be in school or have a job, when he came home. He worked during the months of October, November and December, at the local Best Buy as a seasonal employee. He like it a lot. His employment was over, just after New Year’s, the first week in January. During his first six months of being eighteen, he worked at McDonald’s in Utah and at Best Buy in Northern California. Both were excellent “first jobs” with lots of learning opportunities. And he was able to make some money.

In January, he spent time putting together his application for a vocational college in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. He gathered transcripts from his three different high school learning environments and sent them off. He called the school in Canada and asked them questions about the Computer Software Development major he applied to. If it works out, his goal is to begin course work there in September. (With so many things up in the air world wide, we will just have to see how it all plays out!)

In January and February, he made some attempts at finding a job and had a few interviews but none worked out, until this past week. Ironically, when so many people are out of work due to the Coronavirus pandemic, our son is working as a bagger at the local grocery store in town. It is considered an “essential job” and he is following their guidelines about hand washing, keeping hands off his face and the correct social distancing!

His first paycheck has yet to arrive, but he has full time hours and is very busy in his duties. This comes right after another success: he finally took his driver’s permit test at an empty DMV a couple weeks ago and PASSED! We celebrated with a dinner at the Melting Pot (when we were still allowed to go out to a restaurant in California). He was proud of himself and very engaged at our meal. He shared funny “memes” on his phone and talked about world events with us that evening. It was really fun!

Next up is signing up for a driving course! Not sure when that will be allowed.

The Definition of “Adulting”

As we welcome our son to his new world of adulting, I looked up the meaning on Dictionary.com.

“Adulting is an informal term to describe behavior that is seen as responsible and grown-up. This behavior often involves meeting the mundane demands of independent and professional living, such as paying bills and running errands.”

He has done the following as an eighteen year old, all on his own:

Signed up for the Selective Service (mandatory for US males as they reach 18 years of age.)
Got a tiny nose piercing.
Opened a bank account and maintained it – complete with a few over draft service charges!
Applied for and received a 10 year US Passport.
Is working Full Time.
Voted in his first Election (the California Primary). No surprise he’s a Bernie guy!
Took over his own iPhone account.
Paid bills to: Apple Music, Hulu, AT&T, Apple Care.
Left his pediatric doctor office to join a new one for adults.
Just received his first Jury Duty request in the mail from the county.
Did his own taxes on Turbo Tax and Filed 2 state returns (UT & CA) – He’s excited to be getting a refund!
Passed his CA Driver’s Permit test.

We are very proud of all the adulting steps he has taken. There will be many more to come! One task at a time and one day at a time! There is no substitute for doing it yourself, as the best way to learn how to navigate what lies ahead in the adult world. So far his gap year after high school has included many life skills and lessons! Soon enough he will be grown and flown!

Staying in the moment,

WARRIOR MOM